The 52 Most Depressing Songs You've Ever Heard

Choice phrases from:


Tom Reynolds's


"I Hate Myself and Want To Die: The 52 Most Depressing Songs You've Ever Heard"

"...Sam Stone is basically a composite for Hollywood's ideal Vietnam veteran: an hallucinating psycho with a Fu Manchu moustache who goes barking mad every time a Doors song comes on the radio..."

"...the "quantum tragedy paradigm": the shorter the time two people spent together as a couple, the more overwrought the song is that describes their break-up...."

"...NEIL and Babs phoned in this turgid song with all the energy of a ping-pong match played in zero gravity..."

"...teenage car-crash songs of the early 1960s, where adolescents get incinerated in fiery auto wrecks due to their altruism and stunning lack of common sense...."

"...Had Dion been around during D-Day, the Allies could have dropped her off at Omaha Beach with a PA system and have her sing All By Myself until the German infantry bayoneted themselves..."

"...the band lumbers back and forth between two menacing chords like Frankenstein's monster deciding which villager to pummel,..."

"...NASHVILLE may have a rich heritage of depressing music but this hemlock-gulping country weeper will force listeners to throw themselves into a vat of possum poo...."

"...The Wall, the one album you can never listen to in its entirety unless you own a bong the size of a mop...."

"...most punk music sounds like screaming winos crammed inside a runaway shopping cart..."

"...The Downward Spiral, the perfect album to crank while you're tossing live hamsters into a blender...."

"...Wagner's Ring cycle without the funny hats; the equivalent of an opera company pelting you with copies of Anne Rice novels. You're completely drained when it's over and desperately in need of a shower to rinse off the raven droppings...."

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